10 things they don’t tell you about having a baby

Alfie recently turned four months – I know, doesn’t time fly! My ’10 things’ posts usually get quite a good reception, so I thought I’d write about the 10 things they don’t tell you about having a baby. As always, some of these are slightly tongue-in-cheek, while others are based on my experiences as a mumma so far. So grab a cuppa and have a laugh/empathise with me!

1. You’ll never have a hot drink again
You’ll make a cup of tea/coffee, put it down and then have to feed/change your bubba. Once that’s sorted, said drink will be cold. Don’t even bother putting it in the microwave – the best place for it now, is down the sink

2. You’ll never eat on time
Maybe it’s not even munchkin’s feeding time. That still doesn’t mean you’ll eat as soon as your dinner is ready. He won’t let you sit down and start eating – so of course, that means your dinner will go cold

3. Your baby will have more clothes than you...
Especially when everyone you know will buy clothes for their birth/birthday/Christmas/for no particular reason

4. ...But you’ll still go and buy more
Simply because you cannot resist. Or you’re like me and are particular on where the clothes come from. I challenge anyone to go to Next and leave empty handed!

5. Everyone will want to be your best friend for the first few weeks
You’ll have plenty of visitors but once they’ve met the baby and got their selfie, they will bin you. This is doubly worse if you also move house

6. You may actually get to sleep
The amount of people that told me I would never sleep again and get used to getting up numerous times in the night was insane. Alfie has always been good at sleeping through the night, so I often get six hours sleep, minimum

7. People will stick their oar in
“Are you using dummies?” “Does he drink juice yet?” “Can he eat rice?” – all questions I have been asked. No, no and no again. You really think at three (now four) months old, he’s on proper food – are you mad? And there’s no way on earth I am giving my child something laden with sugar. Thanks for your concern but shoo

8. Mums are super competitive
I won’t lie, I tell people how easy my pregnancy was – when they ask. But some mums are on a whole other level. I’m talking those that brag how their babies started talking at three months, walked at four and now have very high IQs

9. You’ll never be on time for anything again
But it’s cool, your friends will understand. I could allocate an extra half an hour to get ready and I still won’t make it on time. Chances are your little one will need feeding and changing 10 minutes prior to your departure. Packing and re-packing the change bag is hard; getting bubba in their car seat is hard; there will always be something standing in your way

10. But ultimately, you have a new best friend
Being a mum is a full-time job. Sometimes you don’t get a lunch break. There’s no time off when you’re sick. But I wouldn’t change this job for the world. Alfie and I spend a minimum of 14 hours a day together and I tell him everything. We are inseparable. And who else would pose for Snapchat filters with me? He is my best friend

Do you agree with this list and what else would you add?

Love, Lucy xx

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